The gift of Time
The gift of time….
There is nothing more precious to a parent than time, so much time is lost to putting back on the coat for the third time, to cleaning up crushed biscuits or squashed raspberries, running back for the forgotten …. something, going to the park and leaving the park… getting in to the bath, getting out of the bath…. Oh, the list is endless. Add the groceries, cleaning and laundry, booking clubs and playdates, organising birthday parties……. And there really is nothing left…
From the moment your child can…. (this will vary from child to child, based on motivators, sibling order, personality of the child) start to focus on their independence, i.e. giving you back time….
Some toddlers will happily stack blocks in the toy box, happily help to set the table, carry water bottles and snack bags to the buggy, undress for bath time, put dirty clothes in the laundry basket, help to retrieve items for a younger sibling…
I know what you are thinking – but isn’t it faster to just do it myself… they might make a mess or spill something and I am quicker… yes that might be true but if you don’t teach them to get involve or contribute when they can then you will always be doing it.
Getting them involved in helping out, seeing how things are done and following instructions, cleaning up after themselves, putting things away and keeping their space tidy will inevitably result in you gaining more time. Being able to tell your child to go and start getting ready for their bath, or begin to set the table, or start packing their bag for swimming… allows you a few more minutes to do the things you need to do. It is also incredibly important for building their ability to plan and organise, to prioritise their own to do lists and encourage independence.
In a previous blog the need for a priority list was explained – what is most important to you and your child right now…. Having a priority relating to them being increasingly independent is worth the effort needed. You will lose the time teaching them the skill but will gain the time in the future…
For some children helping out a parent or care giver, learning to help out around the house, helping packing for activities or unpacking the groceries can often result in more time with the parent- something the majority of children crave – while they are learning the skill the have direct one to one time with a parent, their full attention and praise and when they have learned to do something independently the parent/caregiver has more time to spend with the child.